We only spent three days in Cairns. And I liked it. It is one place in Australia I would re visit.
Why did I like it? Well - there were a lot of young people there. Lots of young in the street. Lots of young people behind counters. Lots of young people with money. Lots of Asian people. Lots of Americans and Europeans. Admittedly most were tourists. Maybe some of the Asians were here to run businesses. And good on them I say. If you can make a profit out of tourism good on you. This prompts the question - am I ageist? Well probably yes. I admit that my prejudice is that all people older than me are suspect politically. Why did they vote as they did in 1966? Why did they vote as they did in 1975? Both elections where old people proved they were overwhelmingly immoral. Why do they all think we should have a one party state and that the one party should be the National Party? I liked the terrain and the landscape that surrounds Cairns. The land is more undulating than down south. Tall steep hills are close by. The vegetation is different. There is much much more of it for a start. Lots of trees. Lots of vines. Lots of leaves. Lots of grass. The trees are big. The Palms are large. There is obviously more rain. Lots of clouds in the air. Lots of rain. More water everywhere. Water is everywhere standing in large puddles. Although it is a fact that one suburb is called Freshwater. Obviously where they had to go to get freshwater when it was first settled. Water must become scarce during the dry season. Lots of evidence as to the hardships endured when the town was set up and the railway to Kuranda put in. There was however one thing that depressed me enormously. Defeated me really. And that is the continuing local attitude of whites towards aboriginals. I have a photo taken at Kuranda at the village green. The whites all congregate on one side. The blacks on the other. I had a good look at the aboriginals. There were 3 even maybe 4 generations. The generations obviously interacted. A young male turned up late and another young male greeted him as a leopard would in that he imitated a leopards greeting. Maybe he didnt mean this exactly this but it was different. The question is - why are the blacks the other side of the village green? Will they ever come over to the whites side? (I no longer like using the term black. What does it mean. And also the term white is meaningless as well. Although my prejudice is that whites are infinitely more prejudiced than blacks. Whites set the terms. Whites define racial terms and in effect define what races are.) It is depressing to try and analyze this. And people think I am pretentious in even mentioning it. Yet it is self evident. It is an important matter. Aboriginals live parallel lives to light skinned Australians. The two peoples don't mix. They stay apart. When will this stop happening? I did not see many aboriginals in Cairns city. I saw a man and a woman sharing a bottle of wine in the street. I made note that the wine was not the brand I would drink as it was one of the fake brands that are sold in Aldi. I saw several aboriginals using computers in the Cairns Library. These aboriginals were middle aged males and the computers they were using were in a separate part of the library seemingly away from other computers. My impression was that these computers were placed in a position where they would be separate from the rest of people who used computers in the library. I saw an aboriginal boy using the computer in the Information Office to download a computer game to his mobile phone. I spoke to an aboriginal family at the main bus stop but these people told me they were Torres Strait Islanders. Mother and four children. In Kurrunda I spoke to three or four young men who were busking outside the businesses selling aboriginal art. All playing didgeridoos. All painted up. Not a lot of conversation possible. But they were pleased to talk. Or gave the impression they were pleased I made contact. I tried to speak to the men who gave a concert in the Aboriginal Cultural Centre. These were men in their 30's and sang songs and danced about matters relating to aboriginal cultural totems - birds - kangaroos etc. After the concert I asked one singer if there were any aboriginal songs that were solely dedicated to pleasure. He didnt really understand my question so I tried to make it clearer by asking - in aboriginal culture were there any entertainers as such who sang songs simply to give pleasure to the audience? This threw him a bit. He tried to answer by saying that he could only sing these songs in this area - he would not be allowed to sing them in the Northern Territory. I guessed that he was saying that some songs are tied to country. He was not comfortable in answering my query. I made note that the Cairns Council seems to have a policy of not employing aboriginals. There are lots of workers in council uniforms - street cleaners - road repairers etc. Not one of them appears to be aboriginal. Why is this? Why doesn't the council have an affirmative employment policy that favours aboriginals? An affirmative policy may not solve any problems but it should at least be tried. Will ever such a policy be implemented. Probably never. Will aboriginals ever be included in policy making bodies? Will they ever be allowed to make decisions of real import? Will they ever be allocated power that will affect light skinned people? Will light skinned people ever accept dark skinned people into the main stream? To be part of the wider society? What do you think? I am not confident that light skinned people and dark skinned people will mingle soon. I know that the dark skinned people know that the light skinned people do not want them to come across the square and mingle with them. They know they are not wanted so they are not inclined to make an effort that will result in them being rejected and hurt. The light skinned people are not inclined to cross over because they feel they would be entering an unknown foreign territory and there would be something considered shameful in what they were doing.
0 Comments
Left home at exactly 6AM. Traveled to Cobram and then via the Newell to Coonabarrabran. I drove from 6 till 11. Jenny from 11 til 4 with lunch in the middle. I drove into Coonabarrabran, Staying at the Country Gardens Motel. Unit 12. Lunch in Parkes. Indian - only been open for 4 weeks. Quite good food. Tasty but not over flavoured. $31.00 cost. Roughly equal to costs in London. Parkes very different to how I remember it. Forbes also. Every town in fact looks like it has been spruced up. And they do look a bit more prosperous than they used to. All major roads have been re routed around the towns. You have to go to the city centre to see the shops. No obvious signs of heavy rain or flooding. No sign at all really. All creeks and rivers empty. No water holes. Very easy drive. Road quite good.
Saw a slogan on a caravan - adventure before dementia. Went to sleep about 9PM. Slept well. Good shower in the morning. Hard water. What can I say? Have I got London out of my system? Is it possible to let go of the unrealistic romantic attitude I have for it? Do I still see it as my home? Does the thought of it still comfort me in periods of doubt and uncertainty?
Well - yes. And - no. I have to explain myself. In 1968 I felt my life was worthless. I felt I had no life. My life was totally in the power of my extended family. By family standards I was a total failure. I felt totally alien to all people around me. I was held in contempt by everyone who knew me. I had no friends. The biggest impact I had on people was to cause them embarrassment. I often felt real loneliness. The Australian people had voted overwhelmingly to commit troops to Vietnam and I considered this to be totally immoral. And I appeared to be totally alone in feeling this. Arguments often occurred and I was often threatened with physical violence because of the way I thought. Freinds of my father would say that I should be stood up against a wall and shot. And through a series of stupid decisions I had totally ruined my private life. I had unusual sexual desires. I had no meaningful job. I felt I had absolutely no prospect of any meaningful life. What could I do? Well - I could fulfill a long standing desire to go to London. I went to London and my life turned around 180 degrees. Immediately. Without me even trying. London and its people welcomed me with an opened arm embrace. I immediately went from being disliked by everyone to being liked by everyone. If I spoke spontaneously from my heart I no longer embarrassed people. I felt suddenly I was the centre of attraction. And I knew it. I went from having no life to having a meaningful and enjoyable life. And I knew it. I was no longer disliked or misunderstood. And I knew it. And I was in a society that I understood completely. And I knew this society respected me. I was part of it. And I knew it. This society seemed to be speaking directly to me. I liked the people and respected them. I felt completely attuned to the intellectual life. I knew the people. I felt at home. And I knew it. I don't want to exaggerate or be fanciful but this is exactly what happened. It is all true. I went from being unhappy to being happy. I went from feeling I had absolutely no power to having a life that was worthwhile. I went from feeling I was totally insignificant to a life that had some significance. Why was this? Was it even possible to reflect on this? Well yes it was. I knew that part of it was how I felt. I knew that I should not be like this. I knew that no matter where I was I lived inside my body - alone. But is it no wonder that I have a favorable view of London? Or be considered guilty of viewing it through rose tinted glasses. London is a large international city with a mixed ethnic and racial population. I admit I enjoy being in a society of so called mixed races. London is a wealthy city. It is an expensive city. It has poor areas. It has rich areas. It has areas of mixed race. It has areas where races and classes are basically segregated. But nothing is fixed. It is fluid. Unlike my experience of Australia where I felt everything was fixed. I did feel at home. I really did. Woke up at 5. Very little sleep during night. Trying all night to log on to the British Airways web site. We departed from Australia on a public holiday and we leave Britain on a public holiday. BA's website doesn't work on public holidays and their phone number is disconnected. It was the same the day we left. We have to have an aisle seat for Jenny to get to toilet when she is sick. Could we get onto the website to book our seats. No we could not. Tried lots of times.
Of course you can pay $120 each to book early. They make great claims on their website when you buy the tickets that you can organise your seats by internet 24 hours in advance of the flight. You can not. BA are hopeless. Its disgraceful for an international airline to be so incompetent. In the words of Brian Epstein - we will not travel with BA again. Blood Pressure 138/69 Pulse 71 We had nothing planned for what we would do until the flight. We had to be out by 10AM but Tosan allowed us to leave our bags in his hallway therefore saving us the expense and time of taking them to Heathrow and putting them in storage for the day. 24 Pounds in saving. We took the Metropolitan line only to Wembley Park where the train stopped unexpectedly -signal failure. We all had to get off the Metropolitan Line and get on the Jubilee Line. The Metropolitan Line is suspended until further notice. This was a bit of a worry because it meant we could not get back to get our bags and even if we did we could not get the train at Preston Road. But we took a chance and continued on to Bermondsay. Bermondsay was where I first tried to get accommodation but they didnt want someone for 5 weeks. And Bermondsay is about as old as you can get in London. And in 1969 it was very much the deprived East End. As usual it is no longer deprived. Its pretty straight looking. I thought it would have some ethnic character. But it was all closed. Not a shop open. No one in the streets. Who lives there now - not possible to tell. They were taking the holiday seriously. We walked in the direction of London and pretty soon The Shard came into view. Eventually we stumbled on Tower Bridge. It was surprising and spectacular. We had lunch in a Pub within sight of Tower Bridge on Tower Bridge Road. I had Fish and Chips. Jenny had Mexican Salad. A Pint of Ale came in the package but I could only drink half. The waiter gave me a sample before I picked the beer. In a way the areas of London are still pretty defined. The pub is not far from Bermondsey but the clientele was all white middle class. Some Italian tourists. Same with the Pub at London Bridge. Get a bus at London Bridge Bus Station and there is a very wide ethnic mix. Go into a pub over the road and its all white middle class. We walked along the Thames bank towards London Bridge. Many tourists in the area. We had a good look at the New Lord Mayors building. It looks like an Orange cut into slices and not reconstructed properly so each slice underneath is smaller than the one on top. It also looks like its heavier one side and leans toward that side. For a new building I concede it does have some architectural merit. London is awash with new buildings and buildings being constructed. We counted 25 cranes one day before we gave up. There are too many new buildings scattered everywhere all over London. They should have allocated specific areas where new building is allowed. Restrict new buildings to one area and allow areas to retain their past history and flavour. As they have in Paris. London Bridge should have better identification. It certainly lacks romance compared to what it was like 400 years ago. We walked through the city to Moorgate station. Because I was a little concerned we might have trouble getting our bags I decided to play safe and go to the airport as soon as possible. As it was the tube was again operating normally. The signal fault had been repaired. We took the tube to Heathrow via a roundabout way. We took the Metropolitan to Rayners Lane. We then took the Piccadilly to Acton Town. We then took the Piccadilly to Heathrow Terminal 5. If you look at your tube map you will see we took a tour of North West London. When I left London 45 years ago there was only one Heathrow terminal. It was an open largish building full of Indians waiting for relatives to turn up. This was literally in the last few days of unrestricted immigration for all British Subjects. Because it was in the last few days everyone was trying to get to Heathrow. Especially Indians from Africa. And plenty of Indians were at Heathrow hoping they could meet some relatives. Now there are 5 large Terminals. An internal train links them all. They have plans now to put in a 6th terminal. I know London will somehow be able to handle all the people this will produce. Last year there were 600,000 immigrants into the UK and 400,000 settled in London. Its still the best city in the world. And I think this proves it. Heathrow Terminal 5 does not have very good facilities as far as eating and drinking goes. Plus its more expensive than it should be. Plenty of luxury shops advertising duty free. But we waited 4 hours until it was time to get on the plane. When I say its unfairly expensive I concede that airports are very good investments. They are monopolies after all. And I am amazed at how many rich people there are in the world who seem to have no problems with high prices. I listened to Churchill's History of the English Speaking People on the plane. The whole 5 hours. Jenny was not ill. We had a window seat from Singapore. Not much to see as it was dark all the way. Saw what I presume was Alice Springs at night. Streets like spider webs. Or a modern painting. Had to wait 3 hours at Sydney airport for our Melbourne connection. Don,t know why we could not have got on the 3 planes that left for Melbourne while we were waiting. Alex met us and we drove to Tarnook. The place is green which is good to see but our dear Magpie has decamped. I hope she has found a new home. When we were in London on October 2014 we went to Bath and from there to Brighton on the same day. In fact we spent a lot of the day on trains. There was no direct train between Bath and Brighton at the time we were traveling. We had to change at Farnham. No matter. We had a good time enjoying traveling by train. A lot of schoolgirls got on at one time. Towards 5 O'clock some commuters got on the train. It was dark by the time we got to Brighton. And windy. We walked to the pier but even though it had its lights on it was closed when we finally arrived after walking along the beach. Crunching the stones of course. The streets were more or less deserted around the pier. No matter. We walked back to the town centre where I had a stroke of luck. I found a wonderful Indian Takeaway. A small hole in the wall operated by I believe one man. Maybe he had another family member hidden behind a wall. But there could not have been more than two people involved because there was hardly space available for one. He was able to talk to me man to man. He looked me in the eye when I questioned his history. Where he came from etc. He was happy to talk. I liked the man and I enjoyed the curry. It was one of those which make you want to return to Brighton just to get a take away from his little shop.
On the train coming back into London after dark I had an enjoyable feeling of deja vu. You pass through a lot of stations. You don't stop at every station but you slow down to pass through most. When you come to London you start to pass a lot of high rises. Most of the windows have their lights on. There are a lot of street lights glistening in the dark. There aren't many people about. There isn't much evidence of traffic. There are other trains coming and going. Most stations are empty and the only figures to be seen are walking with purpose. Sitting in the train and looking out the window I had a distinct feeling of calm. I found the sight of the buildings comforting. The high rises were warm and welcoming. It was enjoyable watching them pass. They looked peaceful. I felt very relaxed. I sensed I was returning to safety. I was coming home into London. I was at peace with myself. I always had this feeling 43 years ago whenever I returned to London. Especially at night. By train. I recently returned to London after an absence of 42 years. I have had a problem in that since I left 42 years ago I have more or less yearned daily to return. Returning last year did not solve my problem. I know that this feeling of exile is illogical and does not make sense. But knowing whether it makes sense or not unfortunately makes no difference to how I feel. I simply feel at home in London. I know I have a problem. I have to accept that for me London is not just a geographical location on a map. The big BUT is that I feel that London is my city. I feel a direct connection with the place. I feel as if I am somehow a traditional owner of the land. I do actually feel that its mine. I feel as if I belong in its streets. I am conscious of walking on its sacred earth. I always felt as if I was a native living among other natives. I felt a connection with the other inhabitants. I could sit on a tube carriage and feel an identification and a connection with every other person in that carriage. It would not matter what ethnic group they belonged to. They were all my people. I always felt I knew intimately every other person. We were of the same family. I could talk to anyone and indeed I often did. The only people I did not like and feared were skinheads. Take them away and I feel safe with anyone. No one ever refused to speak to me. I found it very easy to strike up adult conversations. London is such an accepting city. I definitely felt accepted in London. I felt I walked taller. I felt I was taken seriously. I enjoyed the sense of being in contact with my peers. I also felt sympathy with others who like me were not accepted in their own country but were accepted in London. I believed we all instinctively knew it was a privilege to be in London. It was safe to be in the company of the many ethnic groups that are in London. I always felt comfortable. Except of course when skinheads invaded the carriage. Ukip are their descendants and are to be feared also .
I accept that how I feel does not make sense. My feelings are illogical. You live where you live. You live in the moment. You inhabit the air you inhabit. No matter where you are on the planet. It is unsafe everywhere. London is no different to anywhere else. I see this as a well known weakness of mine. I feel people can see this when they look at me. |
Categories
All
Topics
All
Archives
February 2024
|